21 Days

Our problems cannot be resolved in the same state of consciousness in which we’ve created them
-- Albert Einstein



Last Friday marked twenty-one days after Kim's Level One Reiki attunement. That's a ballpark number for how long it takes to process all the new thinking, to integrate feelings and to come to balance. My teacher was non-specific about how to use that time or what to expect. So as a dutiful student I chose to study and meditate and practice. In that order.

Surprisingly my interest in practice has noticeably diminished. I had been so eager before the attunement, now I am far less interested in healing others. I feel I could do better insisting that those under my hands learn how to do this for themselves, to rely not on me, but on their own personal power to connect with the Universe.

My interest in meditation increased. Although I am still a lazy meditator, comfortably propped on pillows and foam, I can feel the vibrational energy much quicker now, and it's heavier than before. And I can ask my body to tell me things.

Quick Anecdote: Shortly after beginning Healing Touch (HT) at Mercy, only three months ago, I discovered I was able to locate the source of my own personal pain inside far more precisely than ever before. I would concentrate on my breathing, go inside and thank the pain for showing me an area for concern. Then I asked it to be more specific. A general ear ache, for example, would rather quickly define itself to a location so precise that I could pinpoint it on a 3-D hologram. I could then apply HT laser or ultrasound techniques with loving energy, fall off and wake up without pain.

Here is a summary of 21 changes, many overlapping, that I've noted in the past 21 days or so. Most of these were typed on Day 18, after a peaceful day of skiing:

1. I've found it emotionally freeing to detach myself from anger, judgment and criticism… The "Just for Today…" Reiki principles have helped me to let go much more quickly now.

2. I am much more patient.

3. I care less about what people think of my accomplishments, with less desire to impress or prove myself. I can finally rid myself of the concern about not being “good enough.”

4. I used to set more goals for myself, hold myself to the highest standards, and work this into all my activities. Now I feel a more open and casual. (Sorry, hon, the house may not be as clean as before. And thanks for not pestering me about it.)

5. I love my kids, but don’t obsess or worry about their specific activities nearly so much.

6. I smile more, feel honestly content.

7. I really feel I have all that I need -- right here, right now. Thank You.

8. I feel myself saying "thank you," being grateful dozens of times each day.

9. I am dropping my ego more often, depersonalizing, centering, giving credit to Other.

10. I am consciously reducing the flow of negative impressions, staying away from news or comments which try to influence my judgment.

11. I have intentionally “blown my mind” with books, workshops and internet input that overturns conventional logic, so that I cannot retain a mainstream mindset.

12. My more open mind has accepted ideas that it previously rejected.

13. My "Save the Planet" ambitions have lessened -- from a zealous-passionate 10 to a more moderate 7 -- now that I can no longer hold onto outcome or ego. I think it may be diminishing further.

14. I have no desire to convert anybody, only to provide answers to those who are already seeking or open.

15. I am less interested in healing individuals and more drawn toward intention exercises, global impact with total anonymity.

16. I’d like to connect into the greater web and defer to those with more experience and ability. It would be okay to put my strength behind others to serve a greater good.

17. I have no desire to compete with anyone.

18. I have grown to appreciate the small things and am not so interested in material possessions, getting what I want, or having things a certain way. This has been coming for a long time, but I'll put it in writing now.

19. I feel a peace and tranquility more often -- safe, protected and appreciative.

20. My meditations have changed from feeling "light and carried away" to "heavier with more a distinct vibrational quality." I don't know what that means, but it's real, so I'll note it.

21. I think I'm ready for Reiki II. I didn't even know what that would mean 21 days ago.


According to "The Essential Reiki" it means that I'm ready to memorize some sacred symbols, that currently I still cannot conjure even though I've read their names a hundred times, said them aloud 50, and traced them in the air 25. How come I still haven't memorized them?

Buddhists would say it's because they are protected, and I need Level II attunement, where the Reiki Master gives them to me instead of me trying to grab them before I can absorb them properly.

Then I will be able to connect with my spirit guides and release my intentions over time and space. This is like my overly-eager meditation in the earlier blog entry where I saw so many faces and crossed the planet spreading good intentions.

I should also relate that those 21 days came to a more dramatic close than I ever could have predicted. It felt like a slap to my peaceful contented face. I shake my head as I recall that I had typed most of the 21 changes above on Day 18. Perhaps someone thought I deserved one last lesson to put everything into balance.

So what did I need to learn?

That this stuff is transient, the highs still fleeting, the system far from foolproof.

On Day 20 my husband Rich had a heart attack with me by his side on the slopes. It was one of those silent ones that feels more like weakness with indigestion. Despite advice to the contrary from the clinic we consulted at the base, Rich asked me to take him home for assessment. My pendulum spun nice round clockwise, with just small indicators of something amiss. My intuition felt otherwise, so he ended up in the hospital for a few days of tests. I felt deflated at first, quite let down by my lack of experience and that the pendulum didn't pick up any real deficiency in energy. But I also know we were guided to a right decision.

The last lesson: Deference and humility are essential to the healing equation.